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You liked "The Hulk?" I

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feel sorry for you. Actually, now that I analyze it, I should be jealous: you're very easily entertained.
The first 43 minutes, at least (I became so bored I forgot to further check the clock), showed such fascinating scenes---repeatedly--as test animals being injected in many different ways. Plot? Action? Characters? 43 f $#&^&*^%^ minutes!
And then, after a long, confused bio of the "hero"...what did the monster do? Tear up the scenery! No rhyme or reason to his actions. No drama. Just one BIG tantrum.
And what's with Nick Nolte? It was painfully obvious in many scenes that he's been doing A) lots of dope; B) improv theatre---and probably both simultaneously.
At one point ( I forget where, human consciousness can take only so much), the director thought the labwork was such fun he took us back for another interminable visit.
And notice that Jennifer C has no shots below her waist. She is so emaciated that she makes Gwyneth look curvaceous. I swear to God if that damn lock of hair fell across her face one more time, I would have gone "Hulk"-ish on the tv set (in one scene, Bruce has a charming lock falling across his face: jeez. Can't they afford TWO hairdressers?)
But in a very special class of bad is "Moustache Sam"'s "performance:" absolutely the worst since...well, memory has its limits, too.
Oh, did I mention how dumb the dogfight was? And THAT was the dramatic, action HIGHLIGHT!
Want to see a real green action hero? Go to LeSeur, Minnesota. There, on the outskirts of town, towers a massive replica of the Jolly Green Giant. Now THAT'S an action figure.


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Topic - You liked "The Hulk?" I - tinear 17:00:54 11/13/03 (1)


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