Films/DVD Asylum

Worst Movies of 2005 by Entertainment Weekly

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Syriana right up ther.

EW Worst Movies (Open in New Window)

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To the lowbrow EW's dissing of Syriana one may add the highbrow New Yorker. - clarkjohnsen 13:46:03 12/27/05 (5)
"MERE ACTIVITY HAS REPLACED STORYTELLING, IRONY HAS REPLACED HEROISM, AND THE TASTE OF VICTORY HAS TURNED TO WORMWOOD AND GALL."
clark (CAPS a mistake)
- Ah, the out of context Clarkism. Actually, David Denby dedicates an - tinear 16:36:14 12/27/05 (4)
  almost unprecedented THREE pages to his review.
  You must have skipped to the last sentence and missed the full review. Here's the first sentence for you: "Syriana," Stephen Gaghan's tense, outrageously complicated thriller about oil, the C.I.A., and the Middle East, is a major film without being a great film."
  I hope you're a bit more honest in your business dealings, Mr. J, than you are on this forum.
  - Gee- it says "NOT A GREAT FILM..." can't YOU read? - EdM 06:44:54 12/28/05 (3)
    NT
    Music is Emotion
    - In your universe, like Clark's, there is nothing between gold and shit? nt - tinear 16:22:12 12/28/05 (0)
      Read Denby's review, clown.
    - Exactly! But it was also a "major film" because some idiots said, "It made me think". Actually... - clarkjohnsen 07:39:32 12/28/05 (1)
      ...I read that line about Crash in the Globe this morning and filed it away for later use. One has to wonder what goes through their brains regularly, if that movie made them think.
      As for that pathetic swipe at me about business honesty, it indicates a mentality that projects its own crudeness onto others, besides straying off the topic.
      clark
      - Which begs the question, of course, when - tinear 16:23:08 12/28/05 (0)
        
        In Reply to: Exactly! But it was also a "major film" because some idiots said, "It made me think". Actually... posted by clarkjohnsen on December 28, 2005 at 07:39:32:
        
        something will make you strain yourself to thought.
No doubt... - cc 07:12:16 12/27/05 (0)
this was penned by a gum-smacking 20 year-old, while listening to the new Backstreet Boys (Backstreet's Back!!!) and wondering why they don't make more movies like 10 Ways to Lose a Guy.
LOTR... hands down. - Victor Khomenko 05:53:31 12/27/05 (21)
Nothing touched LOTR.
- You have not seen Son of the Mask.nt. - jamesgarvin 10:00:04 12/27/05 (3)
  nt
  - Ouch - Jon L 15:14:03 12/27/05 (2)
    I just caught "Son of mask.." the other night on satelite. Wow, I do believe this movie is worse than even "Hitchhiker's guide..."
    - Naah... LOTR is IT! - Victor Khomenko 17:05:23 12/27/05 (1)
      Duck now!
      - You do duck well, Victor, & ostrich too! Surely everyone's impressed by your flexibility. Do you know any other tricks? - Audiophilander 10:16:46 12/31/05 (0)
        
        In Reply to: Naah... LOTR is IT! posted by Victor Khomenko on December 27, 2005 at 17:05:23:
        
        .
- Wow - Jon L 09:37:24 12/27/05 (16)
  You didn't even enjoy some of it?? LOTR is worse than the "bad films" mentioned?
  - Re: Yes LoTR beats them all------- - patrickU 11:23:38 12/27/05 (3)
    The only funny thing about it is this guy....Who is crusading...
    - "Who is crusading..." - Naw, I was opposed to that invasion as well, my Middle Aged friend. (nt) - Audiophilander 12:30:55 12/27/05 (2)
      ;^)
      - Re: Allright, Saladin. nt - patrickU 12:51:40 12/27/05 (1)
        
        In Reply to: "Who is crusading..." - Naw, I was opposed to that invasion as well, my Middle Aged friend. (nt) posted by Audiophilander on December 27, 2005 at 12:30:55:
        
        nt
        
        I keep my knight moves in the Southwest; more Paladin than Saladin, but I've got you covered. - Audiophilander 21:55:07 12/27/05 (0)
        
        In Reply to: Re: Allright, Saladin. nt posted by patrickU on December 27, 2005 at 12:51:40:
        
        ;^)
  - Victor is apparently just being an arsehole or being himself, if you prefer. - Audiophilander 11:15:13 12/27/05 (11)
    He seems to enjoy stirring things up by attacking movies that are hugely and/or critically successful, but mostly Mr. Khomenko knows that the LoTR trilogy is a favorite of mine and that I will rebuff his contrarian attacks on this series of films.
    Victor has demonstrated time and again that he hates sophisticated fantasy films and loves to trash LoTR at every opportunity; my guess is that he doesn't have "fun" at movies where he's asked to suspend disbelief and allow his mind to journey into an imaginary realm. OTOH, he'll gladly spread grey poupon all over some lame-arsed Euro flick with his buddy patrick, then they'll proceed to lick it off together in threads that go on ad infinitum.
    The bottom line: Victor apparently prefers pretentious Euro-films with boring characters still searching for the meaning of life while the end credits are rolling. He doesn't like LoTR because it's grand fun and an epic storytelling experience.
    AuPh
    - Well, I've said very little about LoTR... - EBerlin 11:25:40 12/27/05 (2)
      ...and have not tried to bait anyone either, and I think the trilogy is pretty bad, too. The difference between Victor and I may be that I don't mind if others do like it! ;-)
      - Thank you, and I respect your informed opinion even though we differ on LoTR. (nt) - Audiophilander 12:11:21 12/27/05 (1)
        
        In Reply to: Well, I've said very little about LoTR... posted by EBerlin on December 27, 2005 at 11:25:40:
        
        (nt)
        
        You might be amused to know... - EBerlin 12:23:23 12/27/05 (0)
        
        In Reply to: Thank you, and I respect your informed opinion even though we differ on LoTR. (nt) posted by Audiophilander on December 27, 2005 at 12:11:21:
        
        ...that in September I visited the site in India where the swords and armor and other weaponry is made for LoTR and other epics like Kingdom of Heaven. It's called Windlass Steelcrafts. http://www.windlass.com/
        To represent how perverse I am, although I wasn't sold on the generally well-reviewed LoTR, I liked the generally reviled Kingdom of Heaven a lot (which I watched while returning from India). I even thought Orlando Bloom was admirably understated in this film.
        There's simply no accounting for taste!
        eb
    - Re: Mr. Audiophilander, or what is actually your real name? - patrickU 11:22:10 12/27/05 (7)
      Have you escaped again out of the kindergarden?
      "sophisticated fantasy films" Ha-ha...The good jock....
      - "Have you escaped again out of the kindergarden?" - No, apparently just visiting. (nt) - Audiophilander 12:13:16 12/27/05 (6)
        
        In Reply to: Re: Mr. Audiophilander, or what is actually your real name? posted by patrickU on December 27, 2005 at 11:22:10:
        
        ;^)
        
        Re: Is that what they told you? nt - patrickU 12:50:43 12/27/05 (5)
        
        In Reply to: "Have you escaped again out of the kindergarden?" - No, apparently just visiting. (nt) posted by Audiophilander on December 27, 2005 at 12:13:16:
        
        nt
        
        Naw, it's been made abundently clear that you relish the role of Victor's fart blossom... - Audiophilander 22:36:45 12/27/05 (4)
        
        In Reply to: Re: Is that what they told you? nt posted by patrickU on December 27, 2005 at 12:50:43:
        
        ... by the fact that you're constantly in need of an assisted change! It doesn't matter to me whether it's diapers or Depends, your deposits tend to have the same distinct off-color aroma in either case, ...usually grey poop-on. But let's get one thing straight, petit homme: it ain't my job to clean up after your messes here or Outside; that responsibility falls on your buddy Victor's crusty shoulders, and hands. No need to fret though! He's a connoisseur of special "k" from both the Continent and incontinent as reflected in both of your film tastes. :o)
        Salut,
        AuPh
        (PS) Here's a bit of free advice, patrick: Next time don't try getting down and dirty with someone who's used to fighting in the trenches. ;^)
        
        Re: Don�t lower yourself------- - patrickU 04:50:54 12/28/05 (0)
        
        In Reply to: Naw, it's been made abundently clear that you relish the role of Victor's fart blossom... posted by Audiophilander on December 27, 2005 at 22:36:45:
        
        He-he....
        
        Re: More kaka smells in those trenches, AuPh. Don't *lower* yourself (!) * - Guy 01:01:21 12/28/05 (2)
        
        In Reply to: Naw, it's been made abundently clear that you relish the role of Victor's fart blossom... posted by Audiophilander on December 27, 2005 at 22:36:45:
        
        ...
        
        LOL! True enough, Guy. - Audiophilander 11:32:49 12/28/05 (1)
        
        In Reply to: Re: More kaka smells in those trenches, AuPh. Don't *lower* yourself (!) * posted by Guy on December 28, 2005 at 01:01:21:
        
        My field of study did NOT include majoring in Proctology, but I'm sure that The Board has one on call for emergencies with Victor and patrick exposing that side of themselves so often. :o)
        AuPh
        
        Re: Ahh, it's all one big pain in the ass (ex-hemorrhoid patient talking) * - Guy 12:40:54 12/28/05 (0)
        
        In Reply to: LOL! True enough, Guy. posted by Audiophilander on December 28, 2005 at 11:32:49:
        
        ...
Please don't quote up E.W. - jbmcb 23:10:46 12/26/05 (0)
As a magazine it's useful in that, if you're being attacked by someone in a doctor's office waiting room, you can roll it up tightly and use it as a makeshift cudgel. The cheaply stapled edges may do a bit more damage than a more conventionally bound US or Vogue.
As far as the contents of Entertainment Weekly go, well, the advertisements are sometimes amusing, and, if you like looking at pictures of people, there are lots of those...

/*Music is subjective. Sound is not.*/
How could War of the Worlds not be on the list? (nt) - Doug Flynn 22:42:53 12/26/05 (0)
.
Re: Worst Movies of 2005 by Entertainment Weekly - Bersani 18:52:28 12/26/05 (0)
I agree that Hitchhiker's Guide is a bad film, but I disagree with the reason: "...a who-will-save-the-universe plot so coy it's like an intergalactic Laugh-In written by Garrison Keillor."
I was disappointed that the film didn't live up to the book, but there's nothing fundamentally wrong with the plot. Since when is being campy such a bad thing? The world needs cornball schtick lest we take things too seriously. In my opinion the movie failed to capture the spirit of the book, and what was left simply wasn't compelling. THAT'S why it sucked, not because of the story itself.
Ah, film critics... someday most of them will get real jobs.

-Anthony
Sympathy for Mr. Vengeance - Jon L 16:55:22 12/26/05 (1)
Hey, somehow I never saw that one by director Park, maker of "Oldboy," which I enjoyed. Gotta get the DVD.
On the other hand, I wholeheartedly agree with the choice of "Hitchhiker's Guide.." I rarely NOT finish a movie, even bad ones, but I couldn't finish this one.
- I saw it, and absolutely loved it. Too much gore, but lots of plot. nt - Duilawyer 22:33:15 12/26/05 (0)
  .
King Kong made their list as second best... 'nuff said. - tinear 16:36:34 12/26/05 (1)
First? "Munich." A movie is in trouble when its lead character is a cold-blooded assassin (but he won't cheat on his wife, oh no, that would be evil!) portrayed as a sensitive idealist with lofty political feelings. Let's hope Spielberg doesn't decide to film "Dallas: The Life of Lee Harvey Oswald" anytime soon.
- Re: King Kong made their list as second best... 'nuff said. - jamesgarvin 17:15:45 12/28/05 (0)
  "Let's hope Spielberg doesn't decide to film "Dallas: The Life of Lee Harvey Oswald" anytime soon."
  Your first critism: Man, that movie stunk. It was so predictable.

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