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3.5 Wanks for . . .

68.213.100.114

Billy Wonka

These two Netflix Originals just don't make it to the wonkameter.

'A Perfect Day' Nice international cast that is wasted on a meaningless script with little to no direction. Tim Robbins buffooned his way through this dark comedy of aid workers trying to pull a dead body out of a drinking well in Bosnia despite silly UN protocols. Del Toro was good despite the script. You wonder why you are still watching after twenty minutes.

'The Cloverfield Paradox' Again, a nice international cast trying to create drama on a space station using collider physics to create more energy for a crumbling world. "Shepard" keeps failing but then fires beautifully before exploding and causing an alternate parallel and time warp. This is all explained poorly and seems to uncover writers scrambling to churn out something suitable. The cheap shot ending will make you mad.

Follow Ups:

RE: what is "Cloverfield" ? - user510 12:56:27 02/23/18 (1)
Is it more than just a movie? Is it a collection of disconnected movie-length episodes? So far we have 3 movies with the name Cloverfield in their titles.
I did watch Cloverfield Paradox. It helped to be sipping rum with a Coke chaser. I entertained myself by laughing at this movie. And this movie is not a comedy.
While the alternate dimension/time paradox situation may have potential, the screen play does not exploit it well. A saving grace, perhaps is that much of the cgi was, strictly on the visual level, pretty good if not cutting edge. Call it journeyman level graphics by today's standards.
Sci-fi for the hopelessly stupid? Insert your metaphor in a single short sentence.
-Steve

Edits: 02/23/18
- RE: what is "Cloverfield" ? - mkuller 13:13:15 02/23/18 (0)
  ...the first was a suspenseful film about some people trying to escape some monster destroying their city, if I recall, shot with a handheld camera.
  
  The second was a creepy John Goodman in a bomb shelter with a few kids and then turned sci-fi at the end.
  
  They didn't seem connected except by the name. I enjoyed both for what they were.
  
  Now the new Paradox just seems to be trying to capitalize on the name.
Watched the last 15 minutes tonight so I could make fun of it as well (little spoiler) - Road Warrior 21:53:05 02/19/18 (0)
Bwahahahaha, where'd the damn monster come from? Just outta the fn blue, lol. FTR, loved Cloverfield and liked, a lot, 10 Cloverfield Lane
----------------------

"E Burres Stigano?"
"The Cloverfield Paradox" sucks... - musetap 17:28:26 02/19/18 (0)
and, except for the title really has NOTHING to do with Cloverfield and explains nothing about the Cloverfield
incident in any satisfying way in the lame 10 minutes they use to "connect" the two.

Another dumbass "Dark Side of the Sun" scenario.

So, take that dubious connection away and you have a dull film that works as well as most
time/space travel films. Which is not well at all.

I thought Cloverfield was entertaining and well done.

"Paradox" missed both and then some.

"Once this was all Black Plasma and Imagination" -Michael McClure

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